Reverse suction

I am stuck in a vaccuum. Everything around me is still and unmoving--suspended in time.

August. That dreaded period of time when you know school is coming, but it's not quite here yet. I've been working the same, boring part time job for almost three months. I sit by the pool 4 days a week. And this is a private pool, so I can work for hours and not see anyone. Waiting. That's what the whole month is. Waiting for school, waiting to move home, waiting for the day when I finally look pregnant instead of just chunky, waiting to be big enough for my maternity pants so I can stop squeezing into my regular ones, waiting for the first ultra sound. When I was in the third grade, my family went to Disney World. I remember being so excited and anxious the night before we left that I stared at the ceiling with my heart fluttering for hours before finally falling asleep. August feels the same way to me, except instead of lasting for hours, it's days and weeks.

I think being pregnant is one big August. The most amazing thing in your life is about to happen--its coming! You only have to wait...until February. And if all of the waiting and the thinking and the planning and the growing don't kill you, then,and only then, September will start.